Kickstarter: Kicking my Butt

Coming to you from the Hyatt Hotel. Jackson, MS. 4:11 in the am. With the stomach bug. Yes it finally got me. I spent all week watching it hit every one of my boys, knowing that my time was near. And instead of complaining about it, I'm going to tell you the positives. #1- Since I can't sleep, I finally have time for a blog entry. #2- It reminds me that I'm needed. Call me crazy but when my children are sick, I'm comforted by the amount of need they have for me. Not just for meds, clean underwear and a timely puke bucket, but they need my comfort. My hugs. They look into my eyes and actually say "I need you mommy." My heart swells and I'm reminded how and why I love being a mom, even in the middle of out of control bodily functions. #3- For a day or two after the virus is over, I see a number on the scale that I haven't seen since I was 20, and that gives me a cheap thrill and makes me daydream about how proud I would be of myself if I actually earned that loss in weight instead of puking that loss in weight. And #4- That's it. There are no more positives to a stomach virus.

So, this week I feel the need to distinguish where I am exactly on the fitness scale as I start my journey. The bad news? It's pretty much at the bottom again. Where I started two years ago. The good news? Lets see, the good news.... I have no where to go but up (?) I found out I was pregnant last March. And that was the last time I ran, exercised, showed restraint at a buffet, etc. It is what it is. I needed help. Which is why I signed up for Kickstarter through the Crossfit in Tupelo. If any of you have looked into it on-line, it looks freakin scary right? But they have a boot camp just for women and we meet at the park three nights a week. And it's exactly what I needed. An organized, structured routine that kicks my arse into gear and into pain. Led by two super in-shape, super hot ladies who could be fitness models in a Title 9 catalog, they lead you in group, timed workouts that push you to your limits and are often partner-related that motivate you to go hard. The cool thing is the workouts actually only last about 20-30 minutes. But you go balls to the wall and fast for those 30 minutes. It helps with my accountability as well, which really is a powerful tool for anyone trying to get in shape.

The things I've learned my first week with Kickstarter:
1) If I survive this, I'll be smoking hot
2) I might not survive this
3) I have no-repeat NO ab muscles. I went to do a sit up and literally couldn't lift my torso.
4) because of #3 I reminded everyone there twice over that I just had my third baby a couple of months ago. Okay 4 maybe 5 months ago. Whatever
5) having a fitness model type measure your bare belly is a necessarily humbling experience (and no I'm not posting starting numbers. I know I want honesty and full disclosure but I'm not a masochist)
6) I would rather do braless jumping jacks than burpee broad jumps. Not that we do braless jumping jacks, I'm just using it as a point of reference.

**I was going to leave the previous paragraph as is. But after much deliberation with myself I've decided to stay true to the process, the spirit of the journey and my attempt at being real and include my beginning numbers. So it is with a heavy heart, an embarrassed mind and a hesitant hand that I give to you my starting measurements:

Weight: 158. That's right I said 158.
% of body fat: 32.3
BMI: 27.1
Arms: 11.5 (R) 11.25 (L)
Waist: 39 (I know right?)
Thighs: 20

There's just no explanation or discussion needed. It sucks. But that's what I'm here for right?

As part of the program, they also provide us with detailed meal plans that follow the Paleo diet. Honestly, it's time consuming recipes that aren't really conducive to working with three kids and barely making it to class at 6pm three nights a week. I pick two or three recipes to try each week and every other meal consists of foods from the prescribed list. But they arm you with all of the info needed to be successful. You definitely have to plan ahead. A unintentional plus to this program is it teaches you about time management and the importance of being prepared.

Look, I'm aware that I've probably bitten off more than I can chew. I'm aware that I should set my goals more incrementally. Someone told me this week, flat out, that I couldn't do it. And they may be right. And while I am a proponent of honesty, I'm also a huge believer in if you don't have goals, lofty or not, you got nothing. You're not progressing, not bettering yourself, not moving forward, you're just there-taking up space. And at least with this goal I'll be moving toward something that will make me better. It will make me stronger, fitter, leaner, and most importantly, wiser. I may not finish that race. But I'll try. And you know- I think with any goal, with anything you want to become, a good motto is 'Fake it till you make it.' This isn't a wise motto if you want to become a brain surgeon, but pretend to be a runner, actor, writer, happier, sober, nicer, etc. for a period of time, and eventually you will be. Yoda voice: you_will_be.

PS. We are officially registered for the Walt Disney World Marathon January 2014.

Quote of the day: "The future belongs to those who believe in their dreams." Eleanor Roosevelt
Song of the Day: I Won't Back Down- Tom Petty